COACH to COACH Human Connectivity
Connectivity and the capability for change is an emotional bond composed of subjective feelings that come together to create a “special connection” between two people or groups of people. The notion of an emotional bond refers to the arousal of strong feelings or charismatic state. The feelings may range from anger to sorrow; love, joy or any of thousands of emotions that human’s experience and express. It seems clear that we tend to remember emotionally charged events better than the boring encounter. The more the brain connects to an emotional experience the stronger the imprinted memory of that event in the brain’s neuropathways.
Our brains are social. We have a special set of neurons, called “mirror” neurons, to help us with our human connections. When we interact with others, the mirror neurons in the brain help us understand other people’s intentions, feelings, and emotions. They enable us to empathize with others. Some scientists believe mirror neurons provide a biological basis for empathy and social behaviors.
As a species we experience these connections through non-verbal cues such as a facial expression, which tells us more about each other’s thoughts and feelings than actual language, many times. Then there is the use of language and tone, which conveys more than the actual words said. Then there is facial and verbal express. When connecting one on one or within a group, it not only matters what you say but how you say it. Were you smiling, angry, soft spoken, laughing, or playful?
Deep human connection may also cause our brains to synchronize. In the Wired article “Good Connection Really Does Lead to Mind Meld,” Brandon Keim reports that brain scans of a speaker and listener showed their neural activity synchronizing during storytelling. The more the story resonated with the participants, the more synchronization the researchers observed. Scientists speculate that they may be able to see even stronger brain synchronization when people are engaged in deep conversations, a hypothesis that they plan to test.
Albert Einstein once said we experiences ourselves, our thoughts and feeling as something separated from the rest of mankind, a kind of optical delusion of our consciousness. This delusion can become a self-imposed prison for us, restricting our view of life and ability to change. If we want meaningful connections, our task must be to free ourselves by widening our circle of compassion, embracing life and appreciating the whole of nature in its beauty.”
Not only pleasant social interactions open our own minds to possibilities and help us see the world in a more positive light, social connections such as friends, family, community engagement, business associates and colleagues improve our odds of longevity by 50 percent. And learning how to navigate difficult people and situations can help us minimize sessors.
The take-away is that people crave connection, meaning, a sense of purpose and contribution. It’s often easier to connect on a deeper level face-to-face yet in the age of virtual meetings you can still get that meaningful feeling. Try some of these strategies.
. Being a good listener. Try not talking at all and really absorb the conversation.
. Seating though an entire meeting without judging the information being shared.
. Be mentally present and available to brainstorm.
. Asking open-ended questions before you add value to discussion through your comments and replies.
. Think before you speak and find value in other’s perspectives.
. Give authentic support and encouragement.
Be a source of positivity in the synergistic process.
. Allow yourself to interact with curiosity where individuals surface diverse ideas.
. Appreciate where individuals find value in ideas that don’t resonate with your thinking.
. Experiment with integrating new ideas suggested by others to create a solution that is better than yet different from any previously generated ideas.
To connect with someone mentally/emotionally means you share common perspectives or at least appreciate diverse perspectives as if the other person thinks at the same level as you. This type of connection creates a bond and a deepened sense of rapport, as if in sync with each other’s feelings or ideas.
Remember you get what you give.
Call now for your first step to a new you. 404-358-3250 or email coachmikeconner@gmail.com . You can check out coachconner.com for some wellness information.